Epinions Recent Reviews for blackmonolith

Crucial Technology Online Store: Wait a minute... what was I saying?

Sat, 27 Apr 2002 14:59:20 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - This should prove to be the most consumerly-helpful™ review about Crucial.com, if only for the fact that I promise not to use the word "crucial" in any capacity other than naming the company I'm reviewing (with this here sentence being the single...

Dell Inspiron 8100 Series: SCADS Inspired by Inspiron 8100™

Wed, 24 Apr 2002 13:23:58 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Both of us being as timely as someone who's not, officer and I decided that it was high time we offer our SCADS to the Epinions community. After all, the one and only reason we contribute to Epinions is to help consumers make better buying...

Jesus is way cool! (Lexiphiliac W/O)

Fri, 4 Jan 2002 08:39:26 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith -

an·nex

tr.v. an·nexed, an·nex·ing, an·nex·es

1. To append or attach, especially to a larger or more significant thing.

When I found a buttery bloke named annexation doing exactly what the root...

Pounce® Cat Treats—they plump when you cook 'em!

Thu, 13 Dec 2001 18:39:36 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - I've never been that much of a picky eater. While many people (especially uninspired comedians) knock airplane food, I gulp it down with glee. People look down on hotdogs, Velveeta® cheese slices, and Spam® while I'm asking for seconds. I...

Getting Good Head — All 4 of 'em! (DON'T HAVE SEX WITH IT! Write-Off)

Sun, 14 Oct 2001 20:20:47 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - I figured out after my last write-off that, apparently, I'm supposed to include other members in the festivities. Okay, I can roll with the times. I now present you with the "Don't Have Sex With It!" Write-Off, hosted by myself,...

Something Funky In The Air (The Benefiting From Body Odor Write-Off)

Mon, 6 Aug 2001 23:42:29 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Hello friends! This epinion is part of the "Benefiting From Body Odor" Write-Off! This write-off is being hosted by myself, blackmonolith. Members included in the write-off are:

blackmonolith

And now, on with...

"I’m oh… so blind! Tra-la-la! Tra-la-la!"

Tue, 31 Jul 2001 23:06:11 GMT

rating: 1/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - This review was originally written in February. I was about to post it then, but just before I did, I made the mistake of reading repulsemonkey’s review, which blew this one away. He really got to the core of the problem of this film (and its...

Best in Show—Hey, look what I almost stepped in!

Thu, 7 Jun 2001 22:55:35 GMT

rating: 2/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - When I was a kid, my parents would take me to Playland in Rye, New York. I have great memories of this little non-Six Flags amusement park. I remember the little coaster I went on with my brother, where if you survived it twice in a row without...

Soderbergh asks you to "Take The Limey Challenge!"

Sat, 28 Apr 2001 01:05:59 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Read Anthony Burgess’ A Clockwork Orange, and you’ll quickly find that the language is more interesting that the action. It’s the method of storytelling that gets its hooks into you. Stanley Kubrick’s visual approach to The Shining...

Depraved TV Funhouse is a scream!

Mon, 19 Mar 2001 23:55:08 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - What do you get when you combine a really cocky rooster, a pipe-prone turtle, a tail-obsessed dog, a poop-feasting pooch, an overly-square Captain Kangaroo wannabe, and some sick cartoons? You get TV Funhouse.

Airing Monday nights at...

Echoes of Scary Movies Past

Wed, 14 Feb 2001 21:31:55 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - When I was younger, Poltergeist was the ultimate scary movie. Not an easily-dismissable slasher movie, it was so well photographed, written, acted and scored, it stands not only as the best scary movie in my estimation, but as one of our greatest...

8MM - A nearly fruitless exercise in ugly

Fri, 26 Jan 2001 23:43:59 GMT

rating: 2/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - In case you don’t have the shower all ready to go, start running the water now, because this is one ugly movie. It’ll make you feel dirty. But it’s not the kind of dirty where you’ve got schmutz all over you ‘cause you’ve been working hard at...

The Pico Ketchup Wars

Thu, 7 Dec 2000 00:38:53 GMT

rating: 3/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Okay, first off, this won’t be a comprehensive review of McDonald’s. This epinion will focus on a very specific part of the McDonald’s experience, and will not be an overview of the McDonald’s menu, or the sum total of what it’s like to eat at...

CINDY MARGOLIS - MOST downloaded girl, LEAST watched show

Mon, 9 Oct 2000 23:02:18 GMT

rating: 1/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - I'm a guy who loves porn. I really do. I love porn! It'd be safe to say that I'm a porn addict. If you are breathing, and you don't live in fear of God's wrath toward wankin' it, you're nodding your head right now. That's right dude, you know you...

Killian's Red - will it get you all the hot sex?

Thu, 5 Oct 2000 22:14:34 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - *sip*

I've heard enough radio commercials for Sam Adam's beer to know that hops are an ingredient in beer. Now, I wouldn't know a hop from a skip and a jump, or whether it grows on a tree, is dug from the earth like a potato, or is magically...

Edison Field - A Wonderful Ballpark

Tue, 15 Aug 2000 01:30:09 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - If you’re like me, then the very first time you ever entered a ballpark, it took your breath away. For me, it was Shea Stadium in Queens, home of the New York Mets. I remember it clearly. Like so many people have their first ballpark experience with...

America West made my life hell

Fri, 7 Jul 2000 00:40:23 GMT

rating: 2/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - It would soon be the Fourth of July weekend of 2000. I was very excited to see my girlfriend, and spend time in New York during this holiday. After having moved to L.A. last year, I am always excited to return to New York. New York has real...

Absorb the movie, not the hype!

Thu, 22 Jun 2000 00:31:52 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Movies are too often judged with our preconceptions in mind. "Scariest movie ever" and "it redefines horror" were shoved down our throats so much that the hype took on a life of its own. To say that the market was saturated with...

When did MTV become poop-like?

Tue, 13 Jun 2000 21:38:36 GMT

rating: 2/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - MTV used to be so cool! Growing up without cable in my earlier childhood, I was jealous that other friends of mine had cable, and a big part of it was their access to MTV. Of course, the big cliched complaint is that MTV barely plays music videos...

Powerful bat helps get the job done

Tue, 13 Jun 2000 19:02:49 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - I went searching for a bat that would improve my game. The bat selection our league team had was quite dismal, and from using Worth bats at non-league pickup games, I saw that a good bat can make a big difference. I knew that I was a good hitter, and I...

A brand new film from 1981!

Tue, 9 May 2000 22:34:57 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - The first thing you should know is that I had not seen "Das Boot" until recently viewing this splendid Director's Cut version on DVD. Having never seen the original cut-down version, I can only try and imagine what it was like. And in using...

One slammin' DVD player

Wed, 2 Feb 2000 23:35:37 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - I said I would wait. I promised myself that I would wait until I could get my hands on an affordable DVD player that could handle DVD-Audio (multi-channel music that's just now beginning to guide the CD down the road of the obsolete). I even wanted to...

Malkovich is Wonderfully Imaginative

Tue, 18 Jan 2000 23:25:35 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - There I was, my mouth hanging open as I beheld perhaps the most imaginative film I've ever seen. I sat stunned, a grin plastered on my face, and my face hasn't changed much since. I am truly astounded by what Being John Malkovich has achieved...

The Way Andy Kaufman Would've Wanted It

Thu, 13 Jan 2000 00:34:52 GMT

rating: 4/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - This is my review of Man on the Moon. After careful consideration, I have cut down a lot of my writing with the intention of making this as concise a review as possible. In fact, this is the end of my review. I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you...

Comic Genius...again

Wed, 22 Dec 1999 18:05:17 GMT

rating: 5/5 by: Epinions Author blackmonolith - Ok, so you saw "Airplane!". You loved it. You think it's one of the funniest movies ever made, and sometimes wish that you were that silly and clever. Well, for those of you who worship that premier Zucker/Abrahms/Zucker masterpiece, put...